A few years ago, one of my good friends got cancer and died. As with many of those who have seen fit to confer wonderful friendship upon me, she left me with a gift to take along through the remainder of my own life. It wasn't a thing that she gave me; it was a way of thinking. It wasn't even so much the fact that she spoke the idea to me; she actually believed in the idea. When things were at their worst for her she said, "I'd rather have half-a-loaf, than no loaf at all." For me, she has become that phrase.
Her superb spiritual strength was nourished by that good thinking. Perfectionism promises more than it can deliver. Certainly, we ought to work to do our reasonable best; yet, reasonable ought to be the qualifying word. When we make unreasonable demands upon ourselves or others, the result is likely to be depression or excessive anxiety. Women who envision a mythical perfect body often end up with anorexia or bulimia. Some folk finally succumb in the struggle to "get it all," be the best, win every game, and they just "give up altogether."
"All or nothing thinking" has ruined a lot of sanity for a lot of people. According to my friend, you're not going to get all; but then, you're not going to get nothing either! Life is not a case of either/or; it is usually something in between.
Paul talked about an aspect of this subject when he said, "I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, or having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:11-13). Since the day my friend gave me that gift, I have watched many people survive strokes, heart attacks, lost ball games, low test scores, car wrecks, fires, and recessions, simply by being "thankful for half-a- loaf," rather than complaining because they didn't get a whole loaf. "All or nothing thinking" is pure nonsense; go with what you have!